Want to know a secret....

I like stacks. I like to work my way through the stacks feeling as if bit by bit I am accomplishing something big (in a manageable way). I have just over three weeks to get to every cupboard, drawer and shelf emptied and packed up so if I keep at it slow and steady, no worries. What I haven't been doing, however, is painting. It has been too cold and rainy to open my studio door (for ventilation) this past week and to tell you the truth I've lost my focus. I did notice something really strange when I was looking around my studio the other day assessing the packing required. I have sold all but two of the paintings I've made during my time here in California. My work created in this past year of massive upheaval and transition will exist in my mind and in other places but I won't be looking at it daily in my teeny-tiny (warm, dry and well lit) studio. None of the California pieces will live with me. I kind of like that...

I wish you a long, lovely and relaxing weekend.

nest: collaborative tangles with a delicate internal balance

Ok, here's the skinny on the happenings around here. Last month the public school behind my "new old house" announced that it would only have room for current students to be enrolled for 1st grade next year (due to state budget cuts). In light of that fact we had to make some magic happen. So yesterday afternoon Chuck and Sage flew back to Evanston to enroll Sage for the last few weeks of Kindergarten there. The weeks leading up to yesterday filled me with a nervous energy that made it hard to focus on anything other than preparing myself for the separation. I've been a mom for over 13 years and I've never missed anything big and here my littlest guy is going off to a new school without me. But you know what, he's there now and he's fine and I'm fine. Sage is so excited and is in the more than capable hands of my husband with my best friend (and her amazing family) as back up and support (ok, the fact that we can use the mac to video chat doen't hurt either). So for the next few weeks it's just me and the big kids and I will have more time to paint, to pack and to be present here. This is probably much more information than you needed but I feel as if I've been hovering here for a while and this first step back towards home has put me on more solid ground. The image of a nest has been presenting itself to me quite often and I am especially loving the unexpected photo of a nest gifted to me by Tara which will have a special place in my "new old house". The nest photo above was taken with my iphone from a couple weeks ago and forgotten about until this morning...it was a sweet surprise. My nest is messy and tangled for sure, but it is also strong and beautiful. I bet yours is too...thanks for reading.

this and that...

Hey stranger...how are you?

Things are rolling here as one car leaves today, one child and a husband leave on Monday (i'm still in denial about this part and will fill you in next week). Many books have been donated, a few furniture items have been sold (thank you craigslist...i love you) and a large quantity of empty boxes have taken up residence in the living room. I spent a little time in the studio yesterday and started on these two small block paintings. Normally I'm a fan of odd numbers of objects in my work but I'm still in the "this or that" mode I mentioned last week and so each block ended up with two objects rather than one or three and they play off each other as light and dark (go figure). I'm planning to work on these a bit more today and post them tomorrow (we'll see how that goes)....

ps: I also am thrilled to say that I finished up my pieces for ETA LA and am preparing to ship those off tomorrow!

Focus (on what's inside)

Last week I took my daughter for an eye exam and as I sat in the office listening to the doctor ask "Better like this, or like this? Clearer on one, or two? Better on 3 or 4 or are they the same?" I thought to myself doctor you are so wise (isn't that just what we all keep asking ourselves). The constant effort to focus and to clarify keeps us asking those questions over and over and at times it can be exhausting. I'm completely immersed in a shift of focus which is why I haven't been here as much lately (i think about being here often but am easily distracted these days). I've been busy over thinking, purging, planning, packing, and painting as well as trying to stay on top of the daily goings on around here and I have to say things I'm a bit bleary eyed. Time seems to be slipping by quickly but I'm rolling with it knowing that soon this big adventure will conclude and I'll be back in my nest....thanks for understanding and happy Friday....

Wrappinp up the week...

The indigo linen dress C gave me for my birthday was the perfect thing to slip on this gorgeous Friday morning. I love the ease of dresses and skirts and while flip flops would have been an easy match I slipped into an old pair of Camper boots and a new favorite outfit was created. Through the cold and rainy months of winter (which seemed to linger longer than expected this year) I pretty much stuck to jeans and t-shirts or turtlenecks so I'm feeling a bit like a butterfly emerging from a black and denim cocoon. I finally made it into the studio last night after too many days away and it was like drinking water. Painting has become so vital to my well being and I was very, very thirsty. After just an hour of painting I felt refreshed and renewed and energized (those poor ladies had been holding that house in the air for far too long and they finally got their ladders). This painting moved closer to it's final stage and I'm sure I'll be sharing the final image in just a few days (i am kind of in love with this painting and am savoring it...). I also worked on two more pieces for the LA show and think I've got a pretty good feel for what that whole group of six will look like. Now that I've got a handle on work stuff I can focus on prepping some yummy food for a big Mother's Day Potluck we are hosting (i think we are up to 14 adults and 17 kids...yikes). The daily, unpredictable, heartbreaking and heartwarming job that is parenting is something to be celebrated for sure and i wish you a lovely weekend full of humor, grace and love.

ps: love, love, love this song (and movie about parenting and life)...

Where possibility lives...

somewhere between yes and no

(she longed to embrace maybe)

Speaking of rainbows....

My, are they delicious! This weekend was full of birthday celebrations. Saturday for me (and a fabulous lunch here) and Sunday a belated party for Theo who turned 12 last week (complete with flag football, pizza and poker). Let's just say there was no shortage of goodness around here but we are all wiped out and heading to bed early tonight. Sweet dreams and I'll see you tomorrow....